tonight i lament and attempt to forget my horrible failing of today's accounting exam with mrs field's mini cookies and lambrusco. so far the wonderfully sickening practice of gorging and binge drinking has taken me from woeful to thoughtful. thoughtful about everything in fact. about life, love, the universe. deep i know haha. well i just finished watching eternal sunshine of a spotless mind for the 9347587th time and yet again i have fallen in love with the movie. i adore how clever and thought provoking it is, but specifically i love how it reminded me that when you meet someone, memories of the good will always be married to memories of the bad. we cannot merely escape the reality that as humans we will hurt (and be hurt in return), be annoying, pushy, clingy, needed, absurd, perversive, insulting, careless and the list potentially perpetuates. but to find someone who will stand by you regardless of those shitface moments, bickering and an inability to fully understand. someone who knows you for the monster that you sometimes are and is willing to say "ok" and love you all the same, now that is someone worthy of your time and heart.
so i guess as i wonder if the opportunity came, would i ever want to fully erase the memories and existence of a significant person in my life... only to realise half way through how much i still care? would they be worth finding as a stranger once again, repeating subconscious deja vu and finding that despite everything, they would still make a difference no matter how many times i would want to erase them?
now there's someone worth loving.
love,
p.s. sigh at the blanket scene and the goodbye whilst the house is falling apart... michael gondry you're a genius.
ngawww.
ReplyDeletebtw; what's with the change of layout?
getting rid of the black? it's so not you abi. ur changinggg. hahaha
i like this layout. you cant change the background colour or the orange text, how gay. if you could it would definitely be black haha
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